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Post by juniper on Apr 23, 2018 3:38:32 GMT
Complaining gives you brain damage. Here's an interesting article explaining why non-complainers find negativity and complaining so revolting. It's actually rewires the brain in detrimental ways! It has a proven harmful impact on both the complainer and the person exposed to it. I have extremely little complaining and negativity in my life, as i have chosen my way out of situations that foster it. sometimes later than i should have. But the relief is tangible once i am away from it and back around optimists and problem solvers, as i am accustomed to now. it's truly a stressor to a healthy brain. It's interesting how when you are accustomed to gratitude, peace, and optimism toward solutions , the flip side becomes intolerable. For a very good reason! www.talentsmart.com/articles/How-Complaining-Rewires-Your-Brain-for-Negativity-2147446676-p-1.html |
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Post by Goldilocks on Apr 23, 2018 5:39:25 GMT
Some people want to solve things and create a happier world.
Some people want to vent and remain in unhappiness.
Constructive feedback is useful, but as the article explains it must be specific and purposeful. I also think being vulnerable and non judgemental helps.
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Post by juniper on Apr 23, 2018 5:53:51 GMT
and it's interesting to see that it impacts the hippocampus, the part of the brain critical to our capacity to solve problems. So getting mired thinking you can't find solutions actually physiologically makes it harder to find solutions?
You really can get stuck there. I've seen it in people but didn't really think of it as being a problem they are perpetuating in their brain by engaging in the negativity.
No thanks! I guess people not stuck have a natural aversion to because it really comes down to a survival thing?
Instinctively, maybe humans want to preserve their problem solving ability? makes sense to me.
I think complaining and negativity on the internet can be a real trap for people, and it's evident on all kinds of social media.
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Post by Goldilocks on Apr 23, 2018 6:06:47 GMT
I think the hippocampal damage is the physiological appearance of being stuck in the victim role.
Sometimes people are in situations where they cannot currently solve their problem. For example a small child in an abusive home.
I have seen research of animals put into inescapable distress, then once transferred to a situation with an escape. Result was that they did not even attempt escape.
I actually have few complainers on social media. I had one but unfriended her as she was a casual acquaintance. I find too muchnegativity to be very draining.
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Post by juniper on Apr 23, 2018 12:22:39 GMT
I think the hippocampal damage is the physiological appearance of being stuck in the victim role. Sometimes people are in situations where they cannot currently solve their problem. For example a small child in an abusive home. I have seen research of animals put into inescapable distress, then once transferred to a situation with an escape. Result was that they did not even attempt escape. I actually have few complainers on social media. I had one but unfriended her as she was a casual acquaintance. I find too muchnegativity to be very draining. i don't tolerate complaining and negativity on social media either. For one, the people i connect with don't feel entitled to it. It's like i wrote in the advice for dismissives post- birds of a feather flock together. two, it's such a simple fix to unfollow and not have it even visible. I've done that with people i'm acquainted with professionally who like to rant. But why pollute what would otherwise be an enjoyable experience? I wouldn't reinvent my life the way i have to reduce stress and negativity only to sit down at my computer and soak it all in. The article affirms that it's draining for a reason, and it affirms the healthiness of distancing from it. I have only one social media account and this forum and that's the extent of my online interaction. Both sources are positive for me. I think people get addicted to negativity in a sense, addicted to complaining and addicted to mollifying the behavior in others. Perhaps it eases their own sense of powerlessness to do it in a group? I've seen it in groups in workplaces where people fall into cliques with it. My office environment is full of perhaps some of my favorite empowered women and i am truly grateful, we celebrate each other. it is such an uplifting environment. At any rate, i do have boundaries around it that support me. |
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